Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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