he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
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He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
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Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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