butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize