I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
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