I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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