haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
it's like heaven, but drunker
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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