OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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