i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
