You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm really busy with my period
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