Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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