His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
