A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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