Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
