I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Randomize
