I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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