what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
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Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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