i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
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