I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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