1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
