Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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