thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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