well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
