I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i wish my penis had a tongue
only you would photoshop your dick
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
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