Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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