home. puking in laundry basket.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
