never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
