Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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