I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
