it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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