Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
