I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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