we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Randomize
