I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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