Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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