Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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