He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
