i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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