Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
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