And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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