Welp...herpes.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
