I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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