DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
