Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
