Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
