I wish I could teleport
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Bring me that man meat
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
