ya dads aren't the best wingmen
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
