i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
