walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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