he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
