"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
