I don't think brook has ever known best
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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