He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize